Ferrets and Children and Socks, Oh My!

November Notes:

I have written in the past about our white ferret named Trevor.  The thief of slippers and teabags.  As much as we enjoyed Trevor, we were nervous that he would be lonely.  After all, he looked so sad when we could not crawl into his play tubes with him!  So Chris and I tossed any last shreds of sanity aside and bought another ferret for Trevor to play with.  Her name may depend on whom you ask.  She answers to Teacup, Teardrop, Teapot, Little One and Girly.  The ferrets have taken over my dresser.  Trevor sleeps in my underwear drawer and Teacup sleeps in my pajama drawer.  If I use the bathroom, they rip the door open, play fight in my underwear, climb up my body, leap off my head into the bathtub.

Mark has made great progress in his new middle school.  He brings home a “Student of the Week” certificate every week.  He also brings home his full lunch because he and his friends are too cool to eat.  (they are not however, cool about the parent forgetting to send the lunch, huh.)  What he does NOT bring home from school is any sweaters, jackets, hats or binders.  I have threatened to not buy anymore clothes until he brings home what he has left at school.  One day he even came home without socks on and a whole different pair of pants then he had left with.  I never saw those pants or socks again either.  Someday he will come home just wrapped in unused lunch bags, I know it.

Melissa is also doing well, in fact she has joined chorus and a music group at school.  Her school will have a Christmas Show and she will be singing, “Eternal Fruitcake and Oh, Hanukkah” then she will play the recorder performing “Silent Night”, which in my mind is not silent at all, but similar to the sound of eighteen seagulls being skinned alive.  At the sophisticated age of nine, Melissa has decided to become a Goth.  Purple, black and glitter everywhere.  Tight leggings and strangely protruding tutu skirts that seem to mix a little wrong with her Big Time Rush and Selena Gomez music.  All of her Barbie and princess dolls were beheaded, stuffed animals given to me in bags to get rid of…yet, she still sleeps with a stuffed dog named Spot and her head rests on a purple unicorn Pillow Pet.  I was informed that only Bratz and Monster High items were wanted this Christmas.

Speaking of holidays, it was with great regret that we watched our favorite season end.  I still scare the school bus in the morning and the mailman in the afternoon, but it’s just not the same.  I miss the haunted house.  Chris refuses to pack away his three-foot Grim Reaper and is trying to find a Santa hat that will fit its bony head.  I am trying to figure out how to hang a Christmas tree from the ceiling so the ferrets won’t climb or steal it.  I suppose I should clean the house for the holidays.

Chris’s grandparents are coming over this sunday and will never understand why our table is covered in mismatched socks.  They will have enough trouble trying to figure out why we have several smaller rugs that match nothing, not even each other.  Imagine their confusion when the ferrets wander in and steal their shoes right off their feet.  Just wait till poor Grummy tries to use our bathroom!  Perhaps we should cage the ferrets while they visit?


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